


Take Me Out (Take Me Home)

by seekrest



Series: All’s Well That Ends Well (to End Up With You) [7]
Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: (and it finally happens), (and now it’s time to collect), (we must earn our slow burns), Alternate Universe - No Powers, College Student Peter Parker, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Protective Michelle Jones, Protective Peter Parker, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-11-09
Packaged: 2021-01-03 19:48:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21185003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seekrest/pseuds/seekrest
Summary: As Michelle walks away from him, Peter feels lighter than he has in months.Michelle had opened up to him, in a way that he’d always hoped that she would. And yet now, it felt as if they’d crossed a line with each other - one that made their friendship stronger.But Peter hoped that even if he walked into the new semester with wanting to be her friend, that maybe the possibility of them becoming something more wasn’t completely out of reach.





	1. I Wounded the Good (I Trusted the Wicked)

**Author's Note:**

> Shoutout to [blondsak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blondsak) for reviewing all three chapters of this for me. Been working on this for a long time and her input is invaluable <3

Peter is immediately on edge, seeing the way Michelle tenses - the way her shoulders straighten and her jaw goes rigid.

Harry smiles, Peter already hating him for whatever he’d done to make Michelle’s mood switch so rapidly.

“Fancy meeting you here, MJ. Thought this kind of place wasn’t your scene.”

Michelle says nothing, Peter’s eyes dancing between the two of them. He knows that whatever happened between them isn’t any of his business and yet he’s struck with an unbearable need to stand between them, knowing Michelle was capable of taking care of herself.

It’s innate, a primal response to take care of her that Peter’s rational mind can barely hold back from. But he does, holding his tongue as Michelle finally speaks.

“You don’t know everything about me, Harry.”

“I know enough. Enough to know that it’s been too long since we’ve had a chance to catch up. I’ve missed you and your sass, MJ.”

Michelle grinds her teeth, Peter watching as she stands up taller. “You don’t get to miss me, Harry. I thought I made it clear I want nothing to do with you.”

“Come on, MJ don’t be like that. Feels just like yesterday that you and I had a good thing. Anyway, this place is feeling kind of crowded. Can we talk?” Harry asks, pointedly looking towards Peter before his eyes go back to Michelle. “Alone.”

_ Like hell _, Peter thinks - forcing himself to stay silent as he looks towards Michelle. 

Michelle for her part, seems completely unmoved, standing back with her arms folded. “Whatever you have to say, you can say it in front of Peter.”

Harry turns to him, a flash of anger in his eyes that Peter barely catches before it disappears - transformed into a congenial smile that Peter doesn’t trust for a second.

“Peter is it? And how do you know, MJ?”

“That’s none of your business, Harry.” Michelle fumes, taking a step towards Peter as he responds in kind. They’re close, closer than what friends should be but Peter doesn’t think of it - all his thoughts focused on her and the menacing way Harry is looking at her. 

Harry scoffs, looking at them up and down before sneering.

“Thought you hated white guys.”

“Not white guys. Just _ you _. Fuck off, Harry.”

Harry smiles again, not even bothering to hide the malice in his voice. “Bold words from someone who was a crying mess the last time I saw you. What happened, found your voice again? Got a fire in your stomach? Does he fuck you the way I used to? Tell me MJ, what’s so special about him?”

“You heard her. You need to back up, man.” Peter takes a step forward, white-hot anger flowing through him so much that it blinds him. Michelle tenses even more, Peter himself shaking with anger. 

But as angry as he is, as much as he wants to wipe the smug look off of Harry’s face, Peter knows that this isn’t his fight - it’s Michelle’s. 

Michelle takes another step forward, the venom in her voice ringing through the air as she spits back. “I. Said. Fuck. Off.”

Harry lets out a harsh laugh, neither Peter nor Michelle moving. He rolls his eyes, before smirking. “I don’t need this anyway. I got better things to do.” He turned to Michelle.

“Have a nice life, MJ.”

“Already am.” She snaps back.

Harry goes to turn away before meeting Peter’s eyes, a darkness in them that makes Peter’s hands curl up into fists.

“When you’re tired of dealing with her shit, come and find me. I’ll hook you up with a _ real _ woman.”

Peter wants to move towards him, but he feels Michelle’s hand on his arm - asking him to stop. Peter meets her eyes, seeing that she’s ready to leave.

And Peter’s content to listen, even as angry as he is - because of the resolve in Michelle’s eyes. She doesn’t want to escalate this and Peter won’t be the one to go against her wishes.

But then Harry speaks again, the anger pulsing through him. 

“Fucking bitch. Wasted a year of my life on a—“ 

Peter’s fist meets Harry’s face before he can even think twice, the pain from it shocking him even as he sends Harry staggering - hearing the shocked gasps of the people around them.

Harry’s down on the ground, holding his jaw as Peter bends over him.

“Don’t you _ ever _ come near her again.”

Harry doesn’t respond, lurching himself off the ground and bowling into him, Peter grunting as Harry starts throwing punches.

He can vaguely hear Michelle’s voice and the voices of others, but Peter’s mind is focused elsewhere - solely on the asshole who was trying to - and succeeding - in landing punches on him. 

Peter hadn’t been in many fights growing up, taking his uncle’s advice about proving bullies wrong through success. But he channeled all his rage and anger and frustration into Harry, the way Michelle had visibly tensed the minute he’d walked up playing on a loop in Peter’s mind.

She had seemed angry but Michelle had also tensed so suddenly, had been so immediately on edge when Harry walked up that the action made Peter’s stomach churn to think what the hell Harry could’ve done to make Michelle seem so visibly shaken.

Peter’s mind goes to dark places, images of Harry grabbing her - of Harry _ hurting _her that sends Peter into a tailspin of rage.

Harry punches his stomach then his jaw, Peter scrambling to throw him off before knocking Harry’s head back, pinning him to the ground. Before Peter can hit him again, there are hands on him - holding him back and shoving him away, looking up to see security guards around them.

“Take your hands off me.” Harry snarls at them as they back off, wiping the blood from his nose from where Peter had hit him before pointing a finger towards him.

“Get them out of here.”

Peter tries to shove the security guard’s hands off of him before he sees Michelle, the anger in her eyes so visible it makes him pause. Whether that anger is directed towards him, towards Harry or the situation, Peter doesn’t know but it’s enough that the guards have enough room to start to move him to the door.

“I’m going, I’m going.” Peter mutters, Michelle not too far behind. He sees Betty and Ned out of the corner of his eye, the guards’ hands only releasing Peter when he’s out the door.

“What the hell—” Ned asks. 

“We need to go.” Michelle’s voice is sharp, Peter realizing now without the guards’ hands on him how unsteady he was. Harry was a piece of shit but he had a mean right hook, Peter already feeling the bruising on his face and sensing that his lip had been busted. He goes to take a step forward only to stumble, Ned and Michelle coming up to each side. 

“I got—”

“You don’t have shit, Peter. Let us help you.” Michelle snaps, Peter relenting as he puts his arms over them - Betty walking in front of them to the car. 

Ned helps Peter into the backseat, Michelle going to join him on the other side while Betty goes to ride shotgun. As Ned gets into the driver’s seat, the car is silent - Peter’s own mind finally starting to clear. 

He’d probably messed up punching Harry, knowing that a man like that not only had the financial means to ruin him but was petty enough to do so. Peter also wonders - from Michelle’s silence as Ned pulls out of his parking spot and out of the driveway, leading them home - if she was pissed at him - for embarrassing her, for fighting in the first place, the assumption that she couldn’t handle it to begin with. 

But whatever’s going on in her mind, Michelle keeps it to herself - glancing at him with a look he can’t place before looking out the window. 

And Peter, despite the thick silence in the car and the pain shooting up his side and across his jaw, couldn’t bring himself to regret it. 

Whatever the hell Harry had done to Michelle, Peter couldn’t change it. 

But he punched him. 

And even if it was wrong, even if it hadn’t been his fight to have - it made Peter feel better. 

* * *

The silence doesn’t end when they arrive back home, Ned and Michelle helping him back up to their apartment. It’s not until Betty closes the door behind them that Peter realizes how much pain he’s actually in, limping as he walks towards his bedroom.

“Where are you going?” 

Michelle’s question makes him stop, turning to face her - seeing the concern all over her face. 

“I’m, I’m gonna—”

“You need to get cleaned up. And if you don’t get ice on that, you’re gonna have a hell of a bruise.” She says, pointing towards his eye. 

He sees Ned and Betty share a look but before he can answer, Betty speaks.

“Ned and I are gonna go out for more ice.” Ned shoots her a confused look. 

“Betty we don’t—“ She gives him another meaningful look, Peter almost feeling how embarrassed at how obvious they were being before Ned understands, nodding his head. 

“Yeah, we’ll uh, we’ll be back. But like, later. Don’t wait up.”

He sees Betty hit Ned as they walk back towards the door, Peter and Michelle watching them exit as he shifts his weight back and forth. 

They were clearly trying to get the two of them alone together, knew probably better than anyone that tonight had been laced with problems that went far beyond the night’s events. It occurred to Peter that for as close as he was to Ned now, he hadn’t really talked to him about everything that happened with Michelle - wondering from the look on Michelle’s face, if she had done the same with Betty. 

“Well, that was awkward but whatever.” Michelle says, shaking her head and straightening her shoulders. “Come on, you look like shit.” 

Peter limps towards her before Michelle goes to him, leaning up against him to help him walk towards the kitchen. She tries to get him to sit but Peter refuses, leaning against the counter. 

“Peter, you’re gonna bleed all over the floor.”

“I won’t. I’m fine.” Michelle rolls her eyes, going for one of their dish towels - running it under the water before gingerly touching his face. Peter winces at it, Michelle grimacing. 

“Sorry. You just… he got you good.” 

“You should see the other guy.” Peter jokes, Michelle’s face falling - immediately regretting it. 

“I’m sorry.”

“Peter—“

“No MJ, really I’m… I’m sorry.” Michelle searches his face for a second, bringing the towel down. There’s an understanding in her eyes, a recognition that Peter wasn’t just apologizing for the fight - wasn’t just apologizing for possibly stepping over a vaguely sexist line. 

He was sorry for whatever Harry had done, sorry that she’d ever had to deal with something that Peter knows that she never should’ve had to - no matter what it was. 

Michelle’s eyes move away from him. “It’s not your fault.” She goes towards the freezer, wrinkling her nose as she grabs a bag of peas. Peter would almost laugh if he wasn’t in so much pain, seeing the disgust written all over her face.

“I don’t know _ why _ Ned’s so insistent on buying a pound of these every time. He’s the only one who ever eats them.”

“He’s not the_ only _ one,” Peter says, wincing as Michelle brings it up to his eye, closing the other one from the coolness of the bag. “ _ You're _ the only one who doesn’t like peas, MJ.”

Michelle says nothing, Peter opening up the eye that wasn’t covered to see a curious expression on her face. 

“How do you know I don’t like—”

“We’ve been sharing meals for almost six months, MJ. We _ live _together. I think I got a handle on what you like and don’t like.” 

Michelle’s silent, lost in thought as Peter winces and adjusts his position - her eyes going towards his chest.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, it’s—”

“Peter.” He sighs, adjusting again.

“I think he might’ve bruised something, a rib or something I don’t know.” 

Michelle thinks, before nodding. “Okay, take off your shirt and let me see.”

Peter’s one eye widens. “MJ.”

“I took first aid, my mom’s a doctor and I don’t trust you to actually take care of it so come on,” Michelle snaps her fingers. “Strip.” 

Peter watches her but only sees determination in her eyes, nodding as he works to take his jacket off - wincing not just in pain but at how ruined it was, wondering how the hell he was going to pay the dry cleaning bill on it. 

He unbuttons the dress shirt but has trouble with his undershirt, Michelle helping it off of him before he groans again, bringing the ice back up to his eye.

“Shit Peter, this looks bad.” Her fingers lightly trace across his ribs, Peter’s heartbeat starting to thrum in his ears despite the pain he’s feeling. It’s as if Peter registers for the first time just how close Michelle is, even if her eyes are focused and scanning him for more injuries. 

Peter’s never stopped wanting her, despite what he’s told himself about being her friend. And having her be so close to him, with his shirt off and her hands roaming his body made him wish that he hadn’t been so reckless tonight. 

The last thing he wanted was for Michelle to feel bad for him, to have to take care of him - _ again _ \- when she was the one who had been through something tonight, remembering again how tense Michelle had been - hating Harry for whatever it was that had made her react that way. He shifts away from her slightly, not trusting himself or his emotions. 

“It’s fine, I’ll heal.”

“Peter,” She looks at him but then sees something in his eyes, stopping. 

“I’m more worried about you.” The words are out before Peter can stop them, a whisper that causes Michelle’s hands to still. 

They stare at each other for a second, Peter bringing the bag of peas down from his eye as he looks at her. 

“You don’t have to worry about me.” Michelle responds as Peter shakes his head.

“But I do, I do, MJ. What…” Peter closes his eyes, cursing his curiosity even as it burns through him. 

He doesn’t want to know. 

He _ has _ to know. 

“Did he… did he _ hurt _ you?” 

Michelle bites her lip, eyes shifting away - a look that makes Peter’s blood boil. He’s going to kill Harry, gonna find him and wring his neck, bury his body in a place where no one could—

“Not like that. Not, not like you’re thinking.” Michelle’s voice snaps him out of it, Peter seeing as her eyes meet his again. 

Peter just waits, recognizing the same time Michelle does that her hand is still to his chest. She goes to remove it before Peter grabs her hand, Michelle looking up to him in surprise.

“You don’t have to tell me.” Peter whispers, convincing himself that as much as he wants to know - he would never force it out of her. 

“I just, I’m sorry, MJ. Whatever happened, whatever he did, you didn’t deserve it.” 

Michelle lets out a small laugh, a look in her eyes that makes Peter’s heart break. “I know Peter. He’s an asshole. He’s not worth it.”

It’s silent between them before he hears her sigh, shaking her head as her gaze goes elsewhere.

“I thought I was over it. I mean, I am, over_ him _ but he…” she bit her lip, “He’s really fucking awful. Made _ me _ become fucking awful.”

“You’re not awful, MJ.”

“I know.” She says, Peter feeling as if she means it. “I know that now. I just, I didn’t expect to see him tonight.” 

Peter waits, seeing the vulnerability flash in her eyes. He wants her to be open with him, wants her to reach out - but Peter didn’t want to push her, not when whatever Harry had done had changed her so much that she visibly shook with anger when he was around.

He can see it in her eyes, knowing that Michelle was warring with herself before he slightly squeezed his hand - her eyes meeting his.

“You don’t have to tell me what happened with him. Say the word and I’ll never bring it up again.” Peter says, building up the courage for what he had to say next. 

“But if you want to, I’m here.”

Michelle’s eyes dance across his face, Peter seeing as she grinds her teeth for a second before she seemingly relents - her shoulders sagging not in resignation, but in acceptance. 

“I know.” Michelle nods her head, Peter feeling as if he was actually seeing her walls crumble slightly.

“I want to.”

* * *

Michelle tells him everything, starting from the beginning. From the moment her and Harry had met, how he’d charmed her - flattered her, how their relationship hadn’t been easy but had been electric, all fire and passion and rage. 

It wasn’t easy to listen to, but once Michelle started talking it was as if she couldn’t stop - Peter getting the sense that for as much as she was unloading on him, she was also processing things for herself. 

She told him about the arguments and fights, the way he would buy things as a way of apologizing without ever saying the words - the light going off for Peter what that bracelet must’ve meant to her. 

She told him about the girls he’d hang around with, almost flaunting them in her face anytime they’d go out to make her jealous - the dots connecting for him why she’d acted the way she did about Felicia. 

Michelle seemed embarrassed but she pressed forward, Peter’s admiration for her only growing as she continued. He knew Michelle by now to know that this wasn’t easy for her - not just to talk about her feelings but to be so honest about them - making Peter wonder from what he was hearing how Michelle had been before Harry had walked into her life. 

But Peter couldn’t bring himself to really care about that imaginary woman, not when the one who was standing in front of him was someone he liked just as she was - for far longer than he had ever realized or been able to admit. 

Peter stays silent, forcing himself not to interject when she tells him about the night that led to a misguided proposal - despite everything within him wanting to condemn Harry and his shitty family - the anger still coursing through his veins, grinding his teeth as he listens. 

Peter thought Harry had hit her - the idea of that still making his hands ball up into fists - but this was a different level of awfulness, one that Peter wished he could do something about. He knew from growing up in Queens, knew from dating Liz and from talks with his old roommate Miles about how racist people could be. 

It’s something that he feels he understands in some way, considering his own heritage, even recognizing that he never _ really _would. 

Michelle watches as he stares back at her once she finishes, telling him to put the bag of peas back on his face. 

“I’m so sorry—“

“Peter if you apologize again for something that’s _ not _ your fault—“

“I know it’s not, I just… I can’t believe people still act like that. _ Now _.”

Michelle snorts as she rings the dish towel again, dabbing his lip. “Racism doesn’t have an expiration date, Peter.”

“Yeah, I know. I mean, that’s kind of why I stopped keeping kosher after high school. It was hard trying to explain and it’s a shit reason to do it but…” Peter trails off, seeing the look on her face.

“I know it’s not the same.”

Michelle tilts her head, shrugging. “It’s not, but I understand what you’re trying to say. I can’t stop being mixed and even if you can ‘hide’ that you’re Jewish,” she says as she uses her hands to make air quotes, “it still doesn’t change who you are.” 

They’re quiet for a moment before something flickers behind her eyes, Michelle smirking as she said, “I can’t believe you punched him.”

“I’m sorry, MJ. I knew you could handle it. I made it worse. I didn’t mean to overstep—“

“Are you seriously apologizing for kicking his ass? Believe me, if this dress didn’t cost half my portion of rent, I would’ve been right there with you.” Peter studies her, seeing the humor on her face before he laughs, wincing from the motion.

“Yeah well, I think you would’ve been able to take him.”

Michelle smiles, Peter meeting her eyes again as she steps closer to him. 

“You deserve better than that, MJ.”

“I know.” She whispers, a sense of certainty in her voice. 

It’s quiet for a minute before Michelle seems to straighten her shoulders. “Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up for real. I’m not dealing with you whining about the blood on your clothes when you do laundry.”

Peter laughs, rolling his eyes. But as Michelle walks away from him, Peter feels lighter than he has in months. 

He’s sore, bruising and knows he’s going to wake up with a killer headache in the morning but Peter can’t bring himself to care. 

Michelle had opened up to him, in a way that he’d always hoped that she would. And yet now, it felt as if they’d crossed a line with each other - one that made their friendship stronger. 

As Michelle busies herself with the dish towel, mentioning whether or not they should text Ned and Betty about coming home, Peter thinks back to what Tony had said. 

He liked Michelle, not despite her flaws or problems or her history - but because of them, because they shaped her into the person that she was - a person that Peter knew deserved so much more than what had been given to her. 

And as much as he liked her, something telling him that what he was feeling was beyond a crush - he knew that tonight wasn’t the night to tell her that. 

He was her friend, Peter had decided - and he was going to stick by it. 

But he hoped, maybe - foolishly - that even if he walked into the new semester with wanting to be her friend, that maybe the possibility of them becoming something more wasn’t completely out of reach. 

* * *

The next couple of weeks fall into a new, more comfortable rhythm. Michelle opening up to him had brought them closer - making Peter wonder how long he would be able to keep his promise to himself. 

Tony had been right, he couldn’t walk into a friendship with her with the expectation that it would change into anything different. And yet the closer it seemed that they got, Peter wondering how much longer he’d be able to hold out. 

There was no outward discernible difference. Their schedules didn’t magically change and they weren’t spending any more time together than they had before. But it was something in the way she looked at him, something in the way their conversations would go that made Peter think that maybe Michelle thought of him as more than just a friend. 

He wanted to talk to her about it, though it seemed as if they never really had the time - especially in the week right after the fight with Betty fussing over him and Ned mentioning on more than one occasion that he was a dumbass and a badass all in one breath.

But halfway through February, Peter wondered when the right time to talk to her would be - if there would ever be a right time at all. 

How much of an asshole would he be, to try and tell her that he liked her - to possibly ask her out, go on a real date - when she’d finally opened to him, sharing something Peter knew couldn’t have been easy? 

He didn’t want to take advantage of her or make her think he was anything like Harry, using what he knew about her to get closer to her. 

Peter meant what he said, Michelle deserved better. But just because he knew that she did and believed it wholeheartedly - he never wanted her to think that he had only said those words as a way to convince her that that better was _ him _ \- that Michelle needed anyone to convince herself of that in the first place. 

Michelle didn’t need that, from him least of all - laughing and joking with a softness that he hadn’t ever seen before she’d unloaded on him the night of the gala. It was as if Peter started to see glimpses of a Michelle that he hadn’t ever gotten the chance to know, still believing that whatever Michelle he did see - he would like each and every iteration of her. 

It’s something he wrestled with until he finally called May to tell her what had happened. Peter considered sharing it with Felicia but after their last conversation - she hadn’t seemed interested in anything to do with Michelle. For her own reasons, Peter knew she cared about him. 

And as much as he thought of Felicia as his friend and trusted her, sharing Michelle’s past with her felt more like sharing a secret that wasn’t his to tell. Unlike with May, who he knew would listen without judgement.

Mostly.

* * *

“I’m not sure this is the right time, Peter. It sounds like she has some things she has to deal with on her own.” May says through the phone, Peter walking across campus. 

“I know,” Peter sighs, “I just don’t know what to do. I _ like _ her, May. I know we’re friends and we’re graduating but I don’t want to spend the rest of my life thinking about what if.” 

He can hear May busying herself with something over the phone, knowing she always worked with her hands when she was about to give him advice. Ben used to say it was as if her brain needed the space to focus while her hands were occupied - folding laundry, doing dishes, knitting - something to keep her on track.

Peter let himself wonder what Ben would think of all of this, knowing he had been the more romantic of the two. He would probably say to go for it, see what would happen - take the chance.

But May was practical, as she always was. 

“You know, Pete, meeting the right person at the wrong time still makes them the wrong person.”

Peter’s pauses, his mind running over her words.

“You think she’s the right person for me?”

“I’m not saying that. There’s something to be said about having a choice and the idea of only having one right person doesn’t sit well with me.”

Peter stays quiet, thinking back to the few boyfriends she’d had since Ben. None of them had been serious or lasted for very long. For as rational and even-minded as May was, Peter’s heart still hurt for her at the idea of loving Ben so much that she couldn’t see herself with someone else for long.

“But aside from that, it’s the idea behind it, Pete. It sounds like Michelle’s on a path towards healing, one that you shouldn’t feel as if you have to fix.”

“I don’t want to—“

“I raised you, Peter. You can try and argue with me all you want but I know you better than you know yourself.” Peter stops as he continues to walk towards the apartment, letting May continue. 

“You’ll say you don’t want to fix her and I think you really believe that sweetheart. But I know you too well, you’re going to want to take care of this for her and from what it sounds like to me, she needs to be okay with being there for herself.”

“But what if I _ want _ to be there for her, if she’ll let me?”

He hears May sigh on the other end. “That’s just it, kiddo. I know you like her, but this isn’t the kind of thing you can force. She opened up to you, Pete but you can’t take advantage of that.”

“I wouldn’t—“

“I know you wouldn’t,” May interjects, Peter walking up to the apartment. “But from what I can tell, it seems as if she’s in a really vulnerable place, Pete. You don’t want to be the one she grows around while she tries to build herself back together.”

Peter hears her words and understands the wisdom of them but still feels that he should say something - just _something _ to hint that —

“You said you wanted to be her friend, Peter. So be that. Without conditions.”

He’d never told May about what Tony had said - only that he had seen him in passing. To hear May echo his words only reminded Peter of what he knew in his heart to be true. 

Peter couldn’t push Michelle, not just for fear of pushing her away but the idea of messing up the real friendship they’d built together. As much as he wanted it to be more, walking up the stairs to their apartment - Peter let May’s wisdom crawl into his heart. 

He liked Michelle. But Peter wouldn’t be the one to force her hand, tell her what he wanted without considering what she did.

Michelle had dealt with that enough.

* * *

It took two weeks after seeing Harry before Michelle finally made the call home to tell her parents about everything that had happened with Peter.

They had known about Harry and their breakup from the moment it happened, Michelle still remembering the anger in her mom’s eyes - the fury in her father’s.

It’s the same look that she had seen on Peter’s face, right before he’d thrown a punch at Harry. 

Michelle wondered if Harry would search her out again, to try and make Peter pay for embarrassing him. But he didn’t, Michelle feeling a little relieved even if she almost wanted him to.

She’d meant what she said to Peter that night. If the guards hadn’t broken it up, Michelle wonders if she would have been seconds away from fighting him herself. But Michelle was also done with letting Harry control her or her emotions - and as much as she was glad to move on, a small part of her was glad that Harry had limped away - more so than Peter had.

It was idiotic, reckless and stupid for Peter to fight him yet the look of concern in his eyes as she tried to patch him up spoke volumes to her - knowing that he meant it when he said he would drop it if she asked.

It had been so long since Michelle had allowed herself to feel valued by someone that wasn’t related to her, allowed herself to trust someone else without thinking they would betray her. 

And in telling her parents, Michelle felt like she was finally pushing forward. 

She couldn’t deny her feelings for Peter anymore, nor did she want to. But after everything that happened, after the night of the gala - Michelle couldn’t help but think that starting something with Peter would be the wrong move. 

It was as if she was finally, _ finally _ coming to grips with everything and Michelle knew from her studies - much less life experience - that latching on to someone else on the road to recovery was a recipe for disaster, for both parties. 

Skyping them in her room, when she knew Peter was off-campus with Ned at some game release - gave her the opportunity to talk it out with them.

“I’m glad he kicked his ass.” Her father remarked, Michelle holding back a laugh as her mother rolled her eyes.

“Aaron.”

“I’m serious, Elaine. It’s what that smug son of a bitch deserved.” He says, Michelle smiling as she looked at her laptop screen.

“Is it bad that I really enjoyed seeing Peter knock the shit out of him?”

“Yes.”

“No.”

They answer simultaneously, giving each other a look that makes Michelle laugh.

“It’s not bad, squish but it wasn’t smart. What if he would’ve pressed charges against him? Doesn’t Peter want to go to medical school?”

Her mom’s response sobers Michelle up immediately, grimacing as she thinks. “Yeah, he does. I guess Harvard would care if he had a record.”

“Your mom’s got a point. And it brings something else to mind,” her dad says, Michelle watching as he leans forward, “you two are graduating, squish. You’re about to make a fresh start. Maybe now is not the best time to be getting involved with someone.” 

“I know. And with all that shit with Harry, it’s probably better for me to… just be single for awhile. Maybe pull a _ Eat, Pray, Love _like Aunt Cathy.” 

Michelle’s mom laughs out loud at this, Michelle smirking as her father rolls his eyes. “Don’t remind me of how stupid as hell my family is. Your mom raised you better than that.”

“You stayed home with them Aaron so really, this is your fault.” 

Michelle watches as they playfully bicker, her mind running through her own words. As much as she trusted what her parents were saying, trusted that maybe being single _ was _ arguably the smarter move - Michelle couldn’t help but go back to the feeling that her and Peter had something special before, or at least that they could have.

She had seen it, so clearly - the way he looked at her that night in the kitchen, a look that convinced her that for as much as Peter had said that he wanted to be friends, that maybe that’s not all he wanted.

But Peter had held back, for reasons she didn’t know yet had a sinking suspicion had to do with her in a way that felt wholly new to her.

That he cared about her enough to know she wasn’t ready for anything serious, that even if he was interested, that she should be able to make that decision about whether or not she wanted anything for herself. 

And just like that - she did, saying nothing as her parents continued to go back and forth. 

Michelle liked Peter. And from what she could guess, for how he looked at her, Peter seemed to like her back.

She didn’t want to ruin their friendship, didn’t want to jump into something that she wasn’t ready for. But with the clock ticking down to graduation, knowing the feelings she couldn’t deny she felt anytime their eyes met, Michelle knew she would always wonder to herself what could’ve happened if she didn’t try.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re in the endgame now.
> 
> We must earn our slow burns. And now it is almost time :)


	2. All of You, All of Me (Intertwined)

The moment everything changed was just another normal night at the apartment. Betty was out with a girl from her physics lab, though Michelle wondered if it was friendly or something more. 

Peter was on his way home, she knew his own lab let out late. As it was, her and Ned were the only ones in the apartment - sitting in quiet and comfortable silence, save for the tv in the background playing some show neither of them were watching. 

“What did you want for dinner? I don’t think Betty will be home in time, so maybe we can get some pho?” Ned asks, both of them knowing Betty’s irrational dislike for the warm and delicious soup. 

Michelle glances up from her laptop, seeing the smile on Ned’s face. “Sure, sounds good. Might have to order it in though, I think if I leave this couch before I finish this paper, it’s never gonna get done.” 

“I can pick it up. You want beef or chicken?”

Michelle doesn’t get to answer, hearing the door unlock then, both of them turning to greet Peter - his cheeks slightly pink from the cold and his hair barely contained by the beanie he had on. 

Michelle watched him for a beat too long as he smiled, taking off his jacket before she caught herself and said, “Hey Peter, how was lab?”

Peter smiles, Michelle wondering how it was possible for it light up his whole face, seeming brighter because of the flush of his cheeks. “Great! We’re working on our own wheelchairs now and getting the model right has been kind of frustrating but Mohinder and I got a good plan to get it done before midterms. Dr. Yin said we might be able to release a prototype if—” 

“Yeah, yeah, you’re saving the world. Can we get back to the topic at hand?” Ned interjects, making Michelle laugh as she turns back to him. 

“Chicken’s fine, Ned.” Michelle looks back to Peter, seeing the confusion in his face. 

“Are you ordering something without me?”

“You’re here _ now _, Pete. Pho. Chicken or beef?”

“Same as MJ. Chicken sounds great.” Michelle watches as he slips off his shoes, ruffling his hair as he takes his beanie off. She knew he was attractive, the memory of that first realization on the bus home from Thanksgiving coming back to her. But all that she knew about Peter now, how close they’d gotten - it somehow made him even more appealing.

She hears Ned call their favorite place on the phone, eyes still on Peter as he grins, walking to his room.

“How’s the paper coming along?” He nods to her laptop, Michelle blinking a few times.

“Good. Good, Hardinger’s a pain in the ass but I like the class. It’ll be fine.”

Peter’s smile just seems to get brighter as he goes to open his door, Michelle knowing he was going to grab some clothes before heading to the shower. “You’ll kill it, MJ. You always do.”

With that, Peter disappears into his room, Ned’s voice bringing Michelle back into focus.

“What?” She turns to look at him, seeing a smirk on his face.

“I _ said _ that it’ll be ready in fifteen. I can go get it, since you’re busy and all.”

His tone is suggestive, Michelle furrowing her eyebrows. “What’s that supposed to mean? You know I have this paper due.”

Ned rolled his eyes, sighing as if Michelle had missed something obvious. “I don’t mean the paper, MJ. I mean you making googly eyes at Peter.”

Michelle’s mouth opens, closing it tightly before saying, “I’m not—“

“_ Please _ don’t try and insult my intelligence, MJ. I’ve been watching you two idiots for months now.” Ned stops when Peter steps out of his room, smiling at both of them before walking to the bathroom.

Ned’s quiet until they both hear the sound of the shower running, Michelle just watching him in stunned silence before he continues.

“Are you gonna make a move or what?”

“Ned—“

“Look, it’s none of my business but it’s just sad at this point.” Ned sighs, getting up from the table. “You both clearly like each other. And I don’t know what happened before that stopped you but can you please just figure it out already?”

Michelle’s silent as she watches him close his laptop, getting his stuff together. She’d been debating talking to Peter for the past week, trying to see just how she could bring it up. 

She liked Peter and she was tired of arguing with herself about whether it was a good idea or not. And if it was so obvious that Ned could pick up on it, Michelle knew there was no time like the present.

“I’ll take my time getting the pho. But not too long cause I’m hungry as shit.” Ned laughs, before walking towards the front door - putting on his coat and boots. “See you in a little bit. If you two _ do _ finally get it together, just do me a favor?”

Michelle raises an eyebrow as Ned smirks, saying “Don’t have sex on the couch alright?”

“Ned!” Michelle squawks even as Ned laughs and starts to leave, Michelle hearing the water stop. Peter always took quick showers but now she really hoped that it had been long enough that he hadn’t heard that.

Ned closes the door behind him just as Peter walks out, fully dressed, his hair still soaking wet as he dries it with a towel.

“Did he head out already?”

Michelle feels her cheeks warm, glad that she couldn’t blush as she looks back to Peter. “Um, yeah. Yeah, said he’ll back with the food.”

“Cool.” Peter says, nodding as he goes to walk bacK to his room. 

Even if Michelle feels inexplicably embarrassed by Ned’s comment, she knew he was right. She was tired of waiting, tired of debating what she should or shouldn’t do.

She liked Peter. And tonight she was going to do something about it.

“Can we talk?”

* * *

Peter paused, towel still in hand as he stares back at Michelle. 

There’s something in her tone that stirs something in Peter’s gut, something that makes his heart beat just a little faster.

He tries to swallow it down, putting on a smile.

“Sure, what’s up?”

Michelle bites her lip, nodding for him to join her on the couch. Peter throws his towel in his room before he does, curling one leg underneath him as he sat down, facing her dead on.

Peter waits, seeing the tension in her face before he asks, “Is... everything okay?”

“No. Yes. I don’t know.” Michelle sighs, Peter watching as her eyes dart back and forth. “I haven’t done this in awhile or really _ ever _ because things have never been so fucking complicated.”

Peter’s eyebrows furrow as he waits, Michelle stumbling forward.

“I know we said we were going to be friends and fuck, I love being your friend, Peter. You’re unlike anyone I’ve ever met, like a damn saint. It’s—I don’t ever have to guess what’s going on with you or if you’re saying one thing but meaning another because you’re just honest? Really fucking honest? I don’t know, I don’t know what I’m doing here or if this is a mistake but—“ Michelle meets his eyes, Peter’s heart skipping a beat at her words.

“I like you, Peter. And I don’t want to just be friends. I thought I could do it, I thought I could just suck it up and just accept being friends with you but I can’t.” 

Peter feels like his heart is going to leap out of his chest, his mouth opening and closing as Michelle keeps going.

“And I think you like me too? Maybe it’s all in my head or it’s just what I want to see but—“

“It’s not.” Peter interjects before he can stop himself, Michelle blinking.

“What?”

“It’s not. In your head, I mean.”

Michelle lets out a sharp laugh, pressing her lips together as they stare into each other’s eyes. It would be more uncomfortable if Peter wasn’t vibrating with anticipation, everything within him wanting to lean forward and kiss her, wrap his arms around her, feel her against him and never let go. 

But Peter had made that mistake before, rushing forward without thinking of the consequences. If Michelle wanted this - and it seemed that she did - Peter was going to let her take the lead.

But he figured he could help her out.

“I like you, MJ.” He says, seeing the flicker of something in her eyes.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Peter nods, leaning closer. Michelle does too, searching her face as she smiles.

“Well, that was easy.”

“Huh?” Peter can’t help but blink in surprise as Michelle grins.

“I thought I was going to have to convince you that this was a good idea. Jury’s still out if it is, but… this was a lot easier than I thought it was going to be.”

“You don’t think we’re a good idea?” Peter questions, Michelle sighing as her shoulders sag.

“No? Yes? I don’t know.” She leans her head against her hand, her elbow propped up against the couch. 

“After everything that happened over break, I thought for sure that you wouldn’t want anything to do with me. But then you did and I didn’t understand, I felt like I didn’t deserve it.” Michelle’s voice is low as she speaks, Peter hearing the vulnerability in it even as his own heart breaks.

“MJ—“

“It’s not because of anything you did, Peter. It’s because of me and my own fucked up thinking.” Michelle says, Peter seeing her grind her teeth.

“I let Harry dictate my life for so long that it took me blowing up at you and what Felicia said to—“

“Wait, what did Felicia say?” Peter interrupts, feeling a slight panic. Felicia was many things in this world - funny, fiercely loyal and deeply caring - but tactful, she was not.

“Nothing that wasn’t true.”

“MJ.”

“She said I was being an asshole.” Peter closes his eyes, shaking his head as Michelle continues. “And she was right. I tore your head off in the club that night for no reason.”

“But it _ was _ for a reason, MJ. I didn’t know what the gift meant when I—“

“That’s not an excuse and you know it. You couldn’t have known what that gift meant to me and it wasn’t your fault that you didn’t. That was on me.” Michelle replies, bringing her head up as she stares into his eyes.

“Seeing Harry again, it reminded me that I needed to figure out my own shit before even thinking of bringing you into it.” Michelle bites her lip again, searching his face.

“But I can’t help this… this thing between us. I like you, Peter. A lot, and I’m not sure if I can keep just being friends with you. Even if there’s a lot of shit with me that I still need to fix.”

“I don’t want to just be friends either, MJ. But you have to stop saying that.”

“Saying what?” Michelle asks.

“Talking to yourself like you’re some… some kind of problem. You’re not, MJ. And I’m not perfect either or a saint. I’ve fucked up a lot.”

“Peter, that’s not what I’m saying. I _ know _—“

“I don’t think you do.” Peter says, shaking his head even as he continues. “But I know there’s nothing I can say or do that will convince you of that. I know that’s something you have to see for yourself.”

Peter takes a deep breath, building the confidence to say his next words.

“But if you’ll let me, I’d like to try and show you.”

He sees something in Michelle’s expression crack, Peter continuing before she can say something.

“Not that you like, _ need _ a man to show you that. I don’t mean that, I just mean—“

Michelle’s lips are against his before he can even blink, freezing before he lets himself relax, closing his eyes and bringing a hand up to her face.

Her lips are soft against his, the kiss being gentle in a way that was nothing like it had been in his bedroom before. Back then, Peter had been overwhelmed with an insatiable need to touch her, to be close to her in a way that had been completely unexpected. But now, kissing her felt like something that was inevitable - something he had desperately wanted and yet felt now as if he could really appreciate.

Peter feels one of her hands slowly start to rest on the back of his neck, the kiss starting to deepen in a way that makes his heartbeat thrum in his ears. 

He leans forward, Michelle letting herself fall back on the couch, a movement that allows Peter to hover over her. She parts her legs, allowing him to settle over her as their mouths continue to move, her tongue brushing up against his bottom lip as she wraps her arms around his waist.

It’s that action that makes Peter pant as he leans back, Michelle’s eyes opening in a daze. 

“What?” She asks breathlessly.

“Nothing, just… Ned will be back soon.” 

Michelle blinks, then laughs - Peter furrowing his eyebrows.

“Unless you’re into that…?” Peter asks, Michelle just laughs harder - shaking her head as Peter leans up off of her.

“No, just something Ned said.”

“Do I want to know?” He asks, feeling his heartbeat start to slow as she sits up.

“No, not important.” Michelle laughs one more time before smiling at Peter, tentatively reaching out for his hand.

He takes it without question, squeezing it as he smiles back.

“So.”

“So.” Peter smirks, “What are we…?”

Michelle rolls her eyes even as she grins. “Do you really want to have a DTR? We’re not in high school, Peter. We live together.”

Peter shrugs, trying to be casual even if he means every word. “I mean, yeah but we’ve kind of gone all over the place with this. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to go back and try this like normal people? I’d like to take you out on a real date sometime.”

Michelle understands what he means, squeezing his hand.

“You know, we still have a lot of shit to sort out. This isn’t like everything’s fixed.”

“I know,” Peter answers. “But we can figure it all out. I’d like to think so, at least.” Before he can say anything more, he hears the door unlock - signaling that Ned had returned with the food.

Michelle goes to move off of the couch, Peter still holding onto her hand. She smiles back at him, a look on her face that almost doubles Peter over, the realization settling over him that they were finally on the same page. 

He meant what he said. He liked her - _ really _liked her - but Peter almost wonders if what he felt for her could be more than that - the realization hitting him as she moves off the couch. 

Peter can’t tell her that, not when they’d barely - _ finally _ \- gotten to this point but as she lets go of his hand, going to help Ned carry the food in, Peter’s convinced of it. 

Peter thinks - in a way that he’s sure he’s never felt about anyone else before - that maybe Mr. Stark had been right.

Maybe he kind of loves her. 

It’s romantic and foolish and probably a little stupid, something he won’t dare bring up with her or anyone else just yet. But as Michelle catches his eye as her and Ned walk past, Peter’s sure of it. 

There was something between them, something nebulous and powerful and teetering on the edge of things Peter had never even considered possible before with her.

Peter thinks he might be in love.

And he was willing to wait as long as it took to show it to her. 

* * *

Waiting, Peter thinks ironically - becomes something of a theme between them.

Being on the same page about their feelings felt like the first step in the right direction for a change. The first week and a half after their confession spent much as they were before, though with Michelle being more inclined to sit closer to him as they ate dinner with Ned and Betty, for Peter to hold her hand whenever they went to the store - debating what brand of potato chips to buy this time.

It was nice, comfortable… easy in a way that he hadn’t anticipated but should’ve expected.

Their first date - if it could even be called that, had been to dinner on their own, Michelle making fun of the nervous first dates all around them.

Peter joined in, thinking that for as silly as it was - even if it was their technical first date, that it felt like they’d been together for months - knowing Michelle better than any girl he’d ever been out with before.

It felt _ right _, being with Michelle. Like all the bullshit, all the miscommunication that had taken for them to get to this point - made the fact that they were together now all the better.

And even if Peter knew on a rational sense that they should arguably take it slow, he liked kissing her - liked feeling her against him as they danced around the kitchen together, Michelle leaning over him - grabbing things out of the cabinet with a look that made Peter’s mind run wild. 

It was stupid in a sense. They were adults, they lived together - it shouldn’t be so hard to have sex. 

And yet the universe seemed to still want to mess with them.

* * *

The first time it happened seemed like a fluke, some movie was playing in the background that neither of them were paying attention to - Michelle straddling him as she grinded against him.

“Fuck.” Peter huffed as Michelle moved her hips, kissing him as she did. 

“I’m trying.” She whispered, making Peter laugh until it turned into a moan as she continued to move, his hands gripping her hips tighter to move her against him. But then he’d heard Betty’s laughter in the hallway, the sound of some friend joining her and Michelle sighed, rolling off of him.

“I hate Betty.“ 

“No you don’t.” He huffed, barely grabbing the blanket to cover himself, already half hard before Betty and her friend walked in. Michelle sat beside him as Peter tried to steady his breathing.

“Hey lovebirds, what are you watching?”

“Some murder documentary on Netflix.” Michelle says casually, grateful that she could think faster on her feet than he could.

“Do you and Emily want to join?”

“Nah, we have to study but let us know if you guys want to split a pizza or something. You still got that coupon from Gino’s, Peter?” Betty says over her shoulder, not even looking at them as she sets her backpack down. 

“Yeah, yeah, I do.” He still felt out of breath, paranoid that she could see him even under the blanket. 

Betty laughed, her back turned as she walked towards her bedroom - Emily behind her. As soon as the door closes, Peter lets out a sigh.

“Wanna bet that they’re just gonna fuck?” Michelle asks.

“MJ. Let’s go to your room. ” Peter whispered, caring less about what Betty and Emily were doing and more about resuming what they had started. 

“Unless you have a condom in that bedroom, we’re not going to get very far.” 

Peter sighed. 

“_ Do _ you?” 

“No.”

“That’s what you get for not being prepared.” 

“Can we at least—“

But before Peter can say anything further, Ned comes home - bursting through the door with news about some video game that he and Peter planned to play.

Peter turns to Michelle, ready to ignore him but she just rolled her eyes.

“It’s fine, Peter. There’s no rush.” 

* * *

They might not have been in a rush, but when it happened a second time - Peter was convinced the universe was out to get them. 

He’d bought condoms the next day, but the week got busy - midterms reminding them that even if they were on their way out, they were still in college.

When they finally had a moment together, they took advantage of it - Peter’s bedroom door locked, knowing Ned was off-campus and that Betty had sound-proof headphones - a gift from Peter as an apology for earlier in the year.

Michelle shuddered as he kissed her neck, Peter moving his fingers in a practiced, steady motion.

“Fuck.” Michelle gasped, Peter laughing as he continued to move, her hips bucking up against him as one hand gripped his arm, another wrapped tightly in his hair. 

“I’m trying.” He whispered back, Michelle saying nothing but letting out a moan as Peter began to use his thumb, his fingers still steadily moving inside of her. 

He captures her moan in his mouth with a kiss, moving his hand faster until he feels it, Michelle clenching around him before falling apart. He works her through it, waiting until she stills before sliding his fingers out of her, Michelle panting as he reached for a condom.

“You mean to tell me you were gonna do _ that _ during Thanksgiving break? Fuck, Peter I like May but I would’ve had you finger me under the table if I knew that.”

Peter snorts, ripping the condom open, feeling almost uncomfortably hard. 

“_ That _ would’ve been a great first impression.”

“Fuck first impressions, come on.” Michelle’s eyes are focused now, her hands going to move his boxers.

Only for the fire alarm to ring out, Peter groaning into her shoulder. 

“It’s fine. We can burn. I’ve lived a good life.” He mutters. 

He can feel Michelle’s laughter from underneath him, pushing him slightly with an apologetic look in her eyes.

“You might not care about your life, but I do. I got shit to do.”

“I can’t exactly—“

Michelle looks down with a smirk, Peter hearing Betty bang on their door.

“Guys I think someone burned popcorn again. Zip it up, we gotta go.”

Peter rolled his eyes as Michelle laughed, pushing him slightly till he was on his back.

“We’ll be there in a second.” Michelle calls out, moving his boxers down as Peter’s eyes widened.

“MJ—“

“Betty’s not gonna leave unless we do and while it’s probably just some joker who can’t cook, we can’t be too careful.” She looked down pointedly towards him. 

“And you’re really not in a position to argue right now so shut up and hurry up.” 

Peter goes to say something only to groan, bringing one of his pillows to his face as she took him in her mouth. 

He probably should’ve been more embarrassed that he didn’t last very long, but Michelle was persistent, hands gripping him and mouth moving over him that as soon Peter looked down to her, he didn’t really have a chance. 

He throws his head back against the bed when it hits, barely registering when Michelle finally lifted herself off it. It’s quiet - aside from the blaring of the alarm - as Peter tried to catch his breath. 

“You good?”

Peter nods wordlessly as Michelle snickers, wiping her mouth as Betty banged on his door again.

“You guys!”

“We’re coming!” Michelle winks at her joke, Peter rolling his eyes as he sits up.

“You’re terrible.”

“Are you really complaining?”

Peter sighed, pulling his boxers back up as he went for his jeans.

“Not really.”

* * *

The Friday before spring break, the day Peter was hoping that they’d finally have some interrupted free time - knowing Betty and Ned had already left for Ned’s place in the Hamptons - didn’t have any kind of outside hindrance at all.

He’d been looking forward to seeing her all day, to _ finally _having some time alone when he knew there would be no distractions. Yet when he opened the door Peter knew something was up as soon as he got home, seeing Michelle with her knees curled up on the couch.

“Hey, you okay?” 

She says nothing, causing Peter to panic slightly as he closes the door behind and sets his stuff down. It’s not until he’s sitting next to her that he can see that she still hasn’t looked at him, making him feel even more on edge.

“MJ, what’s going on?”

She says nothing, Peter’s mind scrambling to figure out what it could be. 

They’d made a lot of progress since that first night - not just physically, but emotionally. They had talked, just like Michelle had asked - understanding that what they were doing was anything but simple. 

Peter knew that while everything that had happened between them couldn’t all be solved in a few conversations - ones that talked more about what she wanted and what he did, what they both felt - about each other and the last few months, ones where Peter told her more about Gwen, about Liz, about all the people who helped shape who he had been. But to Peter, it still felt like a start.

The start of something great. 

And yet it was like their relationship was working on two different playing fields - accelerated because of all the shit they’d gone through and because they lived together - while still feeling hopelessly new from the conversations they were having.

For all their talks since that first night, for as close as they had gotten physically, Peter couldn’t help but feel that there was still something holding them back. 

Peter knew their actual relationship was still incredibly new, despite the length of time they had known each other. And that he wouldn’t push her, the fear that if he did, he'd only succeed in pushing her way. 

Peter could guess and assume all he wanted what was going on as he watched her but by this point he’d learned his lesson - he’d rather just ask outright.

“Is this… does this have something to do with Harry?”

It’s the wrong question to ask, Michelle’s expression immediately turning from hurt to anger as she sat up. 

“Not everything’s about a fucking guy, Peter. Much less that asshole.”

“I know, I know,” Peter raised his hands up, biting his lip as his mind scrambled. “I just, I want to help.”

Michelle studies him for a second for laughing slightly, the tension in her shoulders relaxing as her attention turns back to the coffee table. “What’d I tell you? Always thinks a girl needs saving.”

Peter takes the joke in stride, waiting patiently as she sighed.

“It’s not Harry, not today at least.”

She brings up the letter that Peter hadn’t even noticed, his attention having been solely focused on her.

It’s thick, white and massive - Peter’s eyes widening as he looked to her in surprise.

“You got accepted somewhere? Where at, for what—“

“Stanford. Stanford Law.”

Peter breaks out into a smile. “Congratulations, MJ. That’s incredible. Wasn’t that your first choice? What’d your mom say?”

Michelle nods. “Yeah, yeah it is. She’s really excited. It’s not about Harry, exactly. It’s… something else, something he used to say.”

The anger that Peter had felt that night snaps him back into focus, reminding him that he still had to figure out the best way to hide a body before she continued.

“We used to argue a lot. About everything, but especially about school. He always used to make little comments about my getting into MIT, snide remarks about how it’s a good thing he got accepted the year before me, otherwise he wouldn’t have made it in.” She just see the confusion on Peter’s face because she gives a half-smile, one that doesn’t reach her eyes.

“Affirmative action, you know. I would've taken his spot or some stupid shit.”

“You know that’s bullshit, MJ. Fucked up thinking from a fucked up person.” Michelle nods, still holding the envelope in her hands.

“I know, I know that but this, it’s just… a great reminder you know?” Michelle looked back to him, Peter seeing tears in her eyes.

“Reminder that _ I _did this. Me. No one else.” 

“You did. You’re incredible, MJ.” Peter says, going to kiss her before she leans back - Peter frowning as he searched her face.

“But there’s something else?”

“It also reminds me,” Michelle takes a steady breath, “that we need to be smart about this, Peter.”

Peter blinks, confused again as she sighed.

“Look, clearly we have something between us. And I like you, a lot...” Michelle trails off, seemingly trying to search for the words to say.

“But you’re worried about what comes next?” Peter offers, Michelle nodding in relief.

“Graduation, law school, I mean think about it, Peter. We’re so different. We both want to _ do _ things with our lives, both have _ years _ ahead of us with some really serious shit. And with this,” she waves the acceptance in her hand again, “it reminds me that we’re not exactly kids, Peter. Stanford’s my top choice. Did you even apply there? Don’t you want to go to Harvard? What’s that gonna mean for _ us _?” 

Peter feels his heartbeat start to quicken, swallowing down the panic in the back of his throat.

“I just think that maybe we should… think about this. Think about,” she motions between the two of them, “what we’re doing here.” 

Peter takes another deep breath, mind racing before before nodding.

“Okay.”

Michelle just stares at him. “Okay?”

“Okay.” Peter takes another breath, trying to calm himself - understanding the wisdom of what Michelle was saying. 

They’d been dating for three weeks at best, even if they’d been dancing around each other for the past six months. In a month they’d be graduating, heading off into the real world and from the letter of acceptance in her hand - possibly across the country from each other.

But Tony’s words come back to him, the understanding that if you love someone - if you care about them, you have to talk it through. 

Peter was past trying to find meaning in Michelle’s words beyond what she told him, seeing the look in her eyes and knowing that maybe _ she _ didn’t even know what she wanted. 

About the future. About them. 

Peter did - he knew it just as sure as he did that day in the coffee shop, the night before it had all gone to shit. 

Knew it in the weeks they’d been together. Knew that it had really begun all those months ago at that night at Cantab, wondering if it really had started on the day they’d met. 

Waiting for Gwen had been a mistake, foolish and naive - looking for something in someone that was never meant to be. 

But looking at Michelle, seeing the tears in her eyes, Peter knew the truth.

Peter thinks he loves her.

And he was willing to wait - in whatever way possible, however long she needed - whatever it took, for her to know that he wasn’t going anywhere. 

“If you want to take it slow, we can take it slow.”

Michelle rolled her eyes. “It’s not about taking it _ slow _, Peter. It’s about—“

“I know, we’re graduating and there’s a lot of shit in the future we gotta sort out but… we don’t have to do that right now.” Peter offers, reaching for her hand. 

Michelle stares at it for a second before taking it, Peter continuing. “Instead of getting wrapped up in all the ifs, or buts or whys, why don’t we just… enjoy the moment? Just enjoy right now?”

“Peter, I can’t afford to do that. I have to let Stanford know what I’m going to do in two weeks.” 

“I know,” Peter sighs, nodding his head. “I know it’s not that simple. But how about we just put this on the shelf for now, at least till after spring break?” He offers a hopeful smile, seeing her mind racing behind her eyes.

It’s a gamble, one that may not work - but Peter’s beyond trying to plan for anything when it came to Michelle. 

But he knew Michelle enough by now to know that she had to come to whatever decision she needed to on her own. 

Even if that decision took her across the country. 

Peter could hear Felicia in his head, saying that it wasn’t just about Michelle but about _ him _ \- what he wanted mattered to. 

But what Peter wanted was both - Harvard _ and _ Michelle. And even if the two seemed incompatible at the moment, Peter wanted to at least suspend any decision until after spring break - to let them enjoy the week like normal college students before they had to decide something that could change their lives forever.

Michelle seems to consider his request before her shoulders relaxed, leaning forward until they’re in an almost hug. Peter leans back on the couch until her head is resting on his chest. 

He wraps his arms around her, feeling the acceptance of his request as she starts to run her hands across his arm. Peter just holds her tighter, pressing a kiss to the top of her head as she sighs again. 

It’s not the kind of intimacy he had planned for the night but there’s a part of Peter that wonders if this was better.

Peter knew that he wanted to spend any time he could have with her - thinking of waking up in an apartment they owned together, daydreaming of a world where it was just the two of them - with nothing and no one else to think about.

But Michelle had dreams, goals that Peter would never consider trying to convince her otherwise - knowing that if she decided to move across the country, it could be the end of them.

Peter doesn’t think of that or his own future, instead thinking of his own proposed timetable - spring break in front of them.

Whether he had Michelle for another week, another month, or for the rest of his life, Peter promised himself that he’d show her how much he loved her - no matter how much time they had. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do the youths just find out they get accepted via online portals and emails now? Sure. Do I care because there’s nothing like getting that massive envelope in the mail? Nope!
> 
> Also I know I was a tease in this one but I promise I make up for it in the next one.
> 
> We’re almost there!!!!!


	3. I Once Believed Love Would Be Burnin' Red (But It's Golden)

Michelle could feel the sunlight on her face before she sees it, slowly opening her eyes and glancing towards the window.

It was bright, enough to fill up the room, hearing the cries of a seagull even from inside. Michelle smiles, turning over in bed to face him, her smile deepening. 

Peter was sprawled out on his stomach, hair wild and head turned away from her. She could hear his soft snores, bringing her hand out to trace soft circles on his back. 

Spring break was almost over, Michelle remembering that Ned had mentioned that he wanted to have one last breakfast on the beach with the four of them before they headed back. But Michelle wasn’t in any rush to move, her fingers softly brushing across Peter’s back until he stirred. 

He lifted his head then turned to look at her, smiling as set his head back down on the pillow, facing her.

“Hi.”

“Hi.” Michelle’s hand moved towards his face, leaning in until their lips met. She hated morning breath and Peter’s was no different, but there was something about the way he looked at her that made Michelle lose all sense of reason, his lips soft against hers as his arm reached out around her. 

Michelle moved forward, kissing him slowly, feeling the smile on his lips as she leaned back.

“What time is it?” He asks, Michelle watching as he blinked a few times, trying to get rid of the sleep out of his eye as she answered him.

“Early. I don’t know when Ned wanted to meet, do you?”

As if on cue, she hears him - but it’s who she also hears that makes her eyes widen, Peter smirking as he turned over to face her.

“Right on schedule.”

Michelle rolled her eyes as Peter laughed, the sound of it doing nothing to drown out Betty’s moans.

“You think they’d be sick of each other by now. I think they’ve had more sex this week than we have.”

Peter grins, moving closer to her.

“We can fix that.” He says, wiggling an eyebrow as Michelle rolled her eyes once more.

“Not everything’s a competition.” She murmured even as Peter kissed her, moving from her lips to her jaw and neck, running her hands across his arms as he continued to kiss her. 

“If it is,” Peter whispered into her neck, “I think we’re winning.” 

Michelle lets herself relax under Peter’s touch, her mind wandering. Ned and Betty had been a surprise but her and Peter had felt inevitable, something that felt foolishly romantic but also something she couldn’t - and didn’t - want to run away from. 

As Peter’s hand reaches towards the bedside table to grab a condom, moving so that he was hovering over her, Michelle lets her mind drift back to the first day at the beach house - and their first time together. 

* * *

She’d been just as frustrated as Peter with all the distractions. It was as if the universe was playing a cosmic joke on them, making it so that when they’d finally reached the same page only for everything else to become stacked against them.

And then she got the acceptance to Stanford, sending Michelle into a tailspin that she didn’t know how to get out of.

Peter held her all night, running his hand across her back until she was lulled off to sleep, only waking in the middle of the night because of how thirsty she was.

She remembered the immediate disorientation, seeing the drool on his shirt from where her head had been - only to get distracted by how relaxed Peter looked, his arms still wrapped around her as he slept. 

It was something that immediately calmed her nerves, something that she knew was irrational even as she accepted it - swallowing down how thirsty she was and laying back down, hoping it didn’t wake Peter up. She could hear his heartbeat through his chest, the sound of it making Michelle’s eyes start to close - drifting off back to sleep.

She felt safe, in a way that Michelle wonders if she ever had before - knowing she didn’t need another person to protect her yet glad that Peter seemed willing to be there for her anyway. 

It was a good feeling, one that Michelle wasn’t in a rush to end. Even if they had originally planned on leaving that night, Michelle let herself fall back asleep, waking up again only when Peter gently nudged her awake the next morning. 

As they got their bags together, loading it into Betty’s car and driving off to the Hamptons - Michelle was struck by how much her fears the night before felt different in the morning light.

She still wondered how the hell they were going to start something -  _ really  _ start something between the two of them - when they both had different life plans and goals. For as much as she really liked Peter, more than she thinks she’s liked anyone before - they still had only been “together” in any capacity for a few weeks.

Michelle had never been the person to consider rearranging her life for anyone, especially after Harry. And Michelle couldn’t reconcile making a decision that would impact the rest of her life on what Peter was going to do.

She had picked up in the intervening weeks that he had applied to mostly east coast schools, remembering the roommate celebration they had when Peter had gotten accepted to Harvard. Neither of them had heard back from Columbia but Michelle couldn’t help but wonder how stupid that would be to base a decision about her life on Peter.

And it was, objectively stupid. They’d lived together for the past year but as friends - roommates first, Michelle thinking that even if they both got accepted to and separately decided to attend Columbia - something she wasn’t even sure if she could actually make a decision about without being slightly influenced on whether Peter was going there or not - what did that mean for their relationship?

Would they still live together?  _ Should _ they? For as much as she knew Peter, there was still the wonder in the back of her mind if they were moving too fast - their relationship feeling like it was running on a separate track at the same time.

But then Peter had brought her out of her thoughts then, reaching a hand over to her as he drove - his eyes still on the road. Michelle took it without question, looking down to their hands intertwining before glancing back to him, seeing the faint smile on his face.

Peter’s eyes shifted from the road to hers for a moment as he smiled, turning his attention back to driving when she remembered what he had said before. 

They had to make a decision - about school, about them, about the future. But holding his hand as they drove down the road, Michelle let herself give it up - just for the moment.

It wasn’t a feeling that lasted, not for long. 

But Peter was right. They had a week - just one week without classes, without any outside influences or interruptions. It may not have been the smartest plan or the most forward thinking. Yet driving down the road with him, hand in hand - the idea of spending a week with Peter without letting the pressure of real life weighing on her sounded exactly like what she needed.

* * *

When they arrived to Ned’s beach house - after getting lost a few times, much to Michelle’s annoyance and Peter’s frustration - they were both slightly agitated, hungry and ready to get inside. 

It wasn’t the first time they’d argued - as a couple or as friends - but it felt different this time, aggravation that was magnified by their conversation from the night before. A secret part of Michelle wanted to lean into it, to push it away so that when graduation came - leaving Peter was no longer something she dreaded but looked forward to.

But even as she grabbed some of the bags, Peter carrying the rest - Michelle knew she couldn’t keep doing this. Whatever her and Peter had, however long it was going to last - if it ended, it couldn’t end like this - with Michelle pushing him away or letting herself lean into the miscommunication that had fucked them over the past few months.

It still didn’t quell the annoyance she had towards Peter and his insistence that he knew where he was going - moving ahead of him as she knocked on the door.

“Ned said to just walk in.”

“It’s still polite to  _ knock _ , Parker.” Peter snorts, Michelle glaring at him.

“Oh I’m Parker again?” Michelle just rolled her eyes, feeling the smile on her face threatening to break even through her frustration.

“It’s your name isn’t it?” 

But before Peter gets to answer, Ned opens the door - his whole face beaming at seeing the two of them.

“Hey guys! We wondered what happened to you. Come on, Betty’s ordering pizza.” They shuffle in behind him and as it was as if the argument from the car deflated as soon as they walked into the beach house. 

It was cozy, quaint in a way that Michelle hadn’t expected when Ned had first mentioned a house in the Hamptons. It was nice and Michelle could tell from the appliances and the furniture that it was all relatively upscale, but it seemed comfier than she had expected - seeing from the look on Peter’s face that he also hadn’t anticipated what they were walking into. 

It looked like something of a romance novel, one of the cheesy books Ashley had loved in high school - and Michelle had secretly read too. 

Ned seems to pick up on their surprise, grinning as he lead them from the living room down the hall. “Not what you expected?”

“Not much to go on, Leeds. Never been to the Hamptons before.” Michelle answered, not so subtly checking out the pictures as Ned opened the door to their room. 

Ned had a big family and Michelle had inferred from living together that he had money. But seeing it so visibly reminded her that for as much as she spent time with him and Betty, there was still so much she didn’t know - and a bittersweet feeling that with graduation coming, she wouldn’t get to. 

It hit her then again, how much she had looked forward to this - spending time with Peter, hanging out with her roommates without the pressure and stress of school. But the looming deadline of Stanford and their future kept nagging at her, a whisper that this brand new relationship wouldn’t be able to handle the time or distance - that they were still too new to even try and think about a  _ future _ together. 

But Michelle tried to push that out of her mind, Ned proclaiming that he had board games already set up while they waited for the pizza and a tour of some of the boutiques in the afternoon. Michelle caught Peter’s eye as Ned rambled, the genuine smile on his face calming some of her fears.

Peter was right. 

They had a week. 

Michelle should make the most of it.

* * *

The rest of the day passed by quickly, laughing with Betty at how ridiculous Ned looked in some fedora he’d picked up at a corner stand and taking selfies of the four of them in front of a pier. Michelle had had plenty of friends in college, but it was as if this time with her roommates made her feel like she’d found a different kind of friendship group - one that could last forever, if she let it. 

It helped - and didn’t - that Peter was right there with her, holding her hand as they walked - pointing out things in shops that he thought were interesting. It was nice to walk with him, to act like a couple that didn’t have a care in the world. To act as if there wasn’t a looming deadline on their relationship or the reality of what their impending future could spell out for them. 

As much as she tried to push it out of her mind, she couldn’t - Michelle still going back what her Stanford acceptance meant for them and how much she both wanted and wished she didn’t want to hear back from Columbia. 

Because if she got accepted to Columbia and if Peter did too, than any decision about where she was going got more complicated - more intertwined and mixed with her feelings and emotions and rational brain that made it difficult for her to decipher. 

Michelle wanted to go to Stanford. She liked the program, the professors, the opportunities it seemed to afford. And even if Columbia was a great school, in the city and keeping her close to her family - Michelle couldn’t help but think that if she chose to go there — assuming that she would even get accepted, it would have more to do with Peter than any other reason. 

Something that for as much as Michelle wanted to be with him, couldn’t help but think that if she made that decision, it would eventually lead to resentment between the two of them.

It didn’t help matters that Michelle knew that for as much as Peter seemed committed to figuring it all out later, that his own acceptances still hung in the air. Knowing that while he seemed happy to just be accepted anywhere, that Harvard was just as much his first choice as Stanford was hers. 

What if she chose to go to Columbia, and he still went to Harvard? Was four hours really any better than forty-seven, especially when everyone told her that being a 1L was hell? When Peter wouldn’t exactly have that kind of free time to come see her, the first year of medical school being just as busy? What would that mean for their relationship for her to give up her own first choice for him, knowing that even if they were entirely different people - it would be too similar to what she used to do for Harry?

And if Peter chose Columbia, neither of them going to where they had originally wanted - they could possibly succeed and would have each other, but Michelle couldn’t help but think that it would place an even greater strain on a relationship that had already been through so much, the possibility that they would try and force something to work for far longer than it needed to because of it.

This, Michelle thought as she looked through a gift shop - was even contingent on the idea that they would get  _ accepted _ to Columbia, making her consider the actual options she had in front of her. 

They could do long-distance, Michelle wondering if that would really be so bad. But every horror story she’s heard comes back to her, thinking of all the relationships she’s seen - from people who had been dating much longer than her and Peter have - who crumbled under the weight of that separation, much less for two people going into difficult career paths.

Michelle remembers then that that had been part of the reason Peter and Gwen had broken up, wondering to herself just how comfortable he was in really wanting to try that again. 

It was all too complicated, as if the universe was playing a big cosmic joke on her - putting her through all this shit, finally finding a guy she really liked and who really liked her - only for it to be at the absolute worst time.

As they walked down the boardwalk, half-heartedly listening to Ned and Berry squabble about getting gelato or regular ice cream, Michelle wished that she had met Peter sooner - before Harry, before any of the bullshit - even if she knew that any kind of relationship would still be facing these same kinds of questions at graduation.

And it occurred to her that even if they had met before - would they have even been in a relationship at all, considering Peter had been dating Gwen at the time? 

Peter, for his part, seemed to sense that there was something brewing behind her eyes, intentionally pointing her towards things or activities on the boardwalk in the moments when she started to get too distracted or overwhelmed. 

It hit her like a sledgehammer, how intuitive Peter seemed to be towards her - his eyes reading her just as viscerally and as clearly as she had grown up seeing with her parents. The realization was enough to make her pause as she picked at her ice cream - Betty winning her argument with Ned, Peter’s eyebrows raising as he glanced back to her. 

“You okay?”

Michelle nodded, a little too quickly as Ned and Betty continued to chatter on about some movie they wanted to watch. The sun had long set on the boardwalk, the lights from the pier they were on illuminating Peter’s face. “Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Ice cream and I don’t mix well.”

Peter smiled. “You sure that’s it?”

Michelle just bit the inside of her cheek, studying Peter just as clearly as he was studying her. She recognized that today wasn’t the first time that Peter had been able to pick up on what was going on with her - conversations in the apartment where he seemed to understand what she’d said without saying a word, even going back to that awful night at the club - where she had understood what Peter’s gift had meant with his look. 

She’d always wanted that, a foolish and romantic dream of the idea of someone being able to read her so well that she didn’t even have to use words. Even if their miscommunication had fucked them over before, it was different now - a feeling as if they truly understood each other.

And now it was just her luck, to have possibly found that romantic ideal with someone - someone as good as Peter - only for it to be at the most inconvenient time of her life. 

It’s something she’s still thinking of when they finally make it home, Ned and Betty still arguing about which movie to watch when Peter took her hand. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

Michelle doesn’t answer, looking to him while a flood of emotions run through her. It was conflicting and confusing and she didn’t know what else to do with herself. But then she sees something in Peter’s eye that makes her remember that they had made a promise to themselves - to not worry about the future but to just enjoy the week. 

She can’t, not for long. Not with everything else weighing down on her. But if this week was all she had to not think about what came next, she wasn’t going to waste another second.

“Let’s go to our room.”

Peter’s eyes widen, seeing what she’s meaning in her tone and in her eyes before glancing back to Ned and Betty - still in the midst of an argument. 

“I think they—”

“Will be fine. Peter.” It’s saying his name that does it, Peter’s eyes glancing back to her before he nods, taking her hand and walking her to the back. 

He closes the door behind them, locking it as Michelle’s heart started to race. She felt nervous for some inexplicable reason, even if she knew she shouldn’t - thinking back to how close they had gotten to this moment in the weeks leading up spring break. 

They’d seen each other naked, explored each other's bodies to know what the other liked - and yet this felt new, if only because it was their first time truly together. 

But then Peter came up behind her, kissing her shoulder and Michelle could feel the tension start to melt away. She turned to face him, seeing the desire in his eyes as they move closer together, lips brushing against each other as he took a step forward. 

When he finally kisses her, Michelle closes her eyes - letting herself get lost in the feel of Peter’s hands as they traveled along her waist, bringing her own arms around him as his tongue slipped into her mouth. 

The kiss was slow, as if they had all the time in the world - as if there was nothing else but them, as if nothing was hanging over their heads. Kissing Peter felt like she found something she hadn’t realized she was searching for, the movement of their mouths and their hands being practiced but anything but routine. 

Michelle lets herself live in this moment with him, pressing up against him as her hands travel down to bring his shirt up and over his head, breaking the kiss as Peter presses his fingers into her side before moving upwards, unhooking her bra as she started to kiss him again - grateful that she’d had the presence of mind to wear something strapless. 

Their hands weren’t fumbling or awkward, their touch wasn’t hurried or rushed - they knew what they were doing and Michelle knew what she wanted. 

She wanted him, wanted Peter - all of Peter - no matter how long they had with each other. 

The kiss turned into something less gentle, becoming hungrier and more purposeful. Michelle ran her fingers through his hair as he groaned, feeling him harden against her as his hands snaked down her back. 

It’s a kiss that makes her lightheaded, a kiss that’s reaching towards the end of and the beginning of everything. Michelle wants him,  _ needs  _ him - and no matter what happened next, she couldn’t wait any longer. 

He seems to understand, hand traveling under her shirt, before cupping her breast as he kissed her. Michelle loosened her grip around him to lift her shirt over her head as Peter’s hands worked her in small circles, Michelle moaning at his touch as she brings her lips back to his, exploring his mouth with her tongue.

Peter walks them back to the bed, Michelle turning them so that his back was to it. She leans back for a second, Peter’s eyes opening - his lips swollen and his eyes half-lidded as she goes to slip off her shorts. Peter did the same, shimmying out of them in a move that made Michelle laugh for how he almost tripped, losing his balance as he fell back.

“Don’t laugh.” Peter growled, looking ridiculous with his hair ruffled, sitting on the edge of the bed before moving backwards. 

“Hard not to laugh at how stupid you look.” Michelle smiled, Peter’s eyes searing into hers as he pulled her down on top of him. His hands went to grip her thighs as she began to slowly grind down on him, the feel of him against her still a sensation Michelle doesn’t think she’d ever get over. Michelle brought her lips back to his as she moved her hips, Peter’s hands traveling down her back and her ass as if he couldn’t get enough of her either. 

“I don’t look stupid.” He panted, Michelle’s breath hitching as he gripped her tighter, grinding down on him as her hands ruffled through his hair.

“Says you.” Peter shudders when Michelle slowly drags her hips, opening her eyes to see him looking back at her, mouth slightly parted and his eyes half-open. 

Michelle closes the distance, feeling him thrust upwards and herself starting to feel ready, the thin fabric of her underwear feeling unnecessary the more she moved her hips.

“You should listen to me,” Michelle’s voice is low, one of Peter’s hands moving to bring her closer to him, “I got into law school.”

Peter lets out a shaky exhale as Michelle rocks herself against him, shuddering as she felt how hard he was underneath her - their steady movement not giving enough friction to release the tension that was building. 

“Fuck.” She groans, his hands still caressing seemingly every part of her as she braced herself against his chest, grinding down harder. 

“I’m trying.” Peter says, voice low as his hand moved down to where their hips met, running his fingers against her - teasing, just barely cupping the place she desperately wanted him to touch as she sharply exhaled. She’d be more embarrassed at how quickly he turned her on if she wasn’t beyond reason at this point, feeling a primal need to remove any distance from each other.

“Do you have—” 

“Bedside table.” Peter answers quickly. Michelle grinned, laughing as she reached for the box of condoms, grabbing one in the drawer as Peter scooted across the bed until he was against the headboard, ridding himself of his boxers in one fluid motion.

“Someone’s ready.” Michelle looked pointedly down towards him. Peter rolled his eyes as Michelle took off her own underwear, moving back towards the bed. 

“I’ve been waiting for this for a long time, MJ.” Peter whispered, the teasing tone of his voice immediately cut off as Michelle’s hand went to stroke him, sliding the condom on him as she went to straddle him again. 

Michelle hovers over him, Peter’s eyes opening as she braces her hands on his shoulders. Her heartbeat is pounding in her ears, the sound of it drowning out everything else but Peter. It couldn’t have been more than a second but Michelle feels like she stares into his eyes for years - seeing something in them that makes her stomach flutter. 

Michelle’s eyes stay locked into his as she slowly lowered herself down onto him, only closing them when he bottoms out in her, Peter’s hands gently going to her waist.

Peter doesn’t move, letting Michelle adjust to him - letting her take the lead - as Michelle lets out a sigh, slowly starting to move as she brings him closer. Her arms wrap around his shoulders as her hips move, Peter’s hands gripping her thighs as she does.

Michelle is lost to the feeling of him inside of her - moving her hips slowly and then with more purpose until she hears Peter whisper, his hands moving from her thighs to her hips. 

“MJ.”

Michelle says nothing, grinding her hips into his as he moans, until the fingers pressed into her hips have more pressure, Peter saying her name in a way that makes Michelle want to do anything to keep hearing it. 

Time slows for Michelle, feeling that there was nothing else in the universe but them - the synchronous rhythm of their bodies, making Michelle wish they had gotten together sooner so that she could have had him for longer.

“MJ. MJ, look at me.” She does, moving faster as she brings her head back, Peter’s eyes boring into hers. 

Since she was sixteen, Michelle has never been one to place too much emotion into sex. It was physical, fun - something she enjoyed because of how it felt. Michelle has had good sex, bad sex, and everything inbetween. 

But as irrational and as impossible as it was, as foolish as it would seem, the look in Peter’s eyes as she rolled her hips, trying to kiss him but the movement feeling more like they were panting into each other’s mouth as his hands pressed against her back, bringing her even closer to him - made her think that she had never experienced something like this. 

Like someone wanted her, not just for what she could give them - not for a status, or a prize or something to be won. 

That he wanted  _ her _ , looking at her almost as if he loved her. 

As Peter’s own hips begin to move upward, the motion of it making Michelle cry out only for Peter kiss her neck as she moved faster, she knew it - could feel it just as viscerally as she felt him moving inside her. 

Peter loved her, in a way that Michelle had never thought she would be able to have - a foolish dream that had come to life.

She wondered how long he had loved her, what had been the moment that it had happened - if he could even pinpoint it, if it just happened gradually or all at once. 

Michelle’s breathing started to get more ragged, her hips moving quicker and with less fluidity - one of Peter’s hands traveling down to where their hips met, his thumb rubbing against her in the way he knew she liked.

“Peter.” She whispers, panting into his mouth as she tries to kiss him again - the feeling of him - of his hands, of him inside her - making it impossible to focus on anything but the short and rapid movements between the two of them.

She wasn’t usually so quiet, but couldn’t bring herself to say anything more - their movements blocking out anything else, her legs starting to shake as any rhythm that they had found started to fall away. 

He doesn’t answer, moving his hips and his thumb faster as Michelle starts to feel it, rushing towards the edge of something she never wants to leave. Her arms wrap around his neck, pushing herself further into him as he works her closer and closer, her mind going to the impossibility that maybe she loves him too. 

It’s that thought, combined with the movement of his hands and his hips that tips her over - letting out a harsh shudder and gasp as she rides it out, feeling Peter’s hips start to buck under her until a few moments later, she knows he’s found his release too. 

It travels over her, her whole body shaking as she collapses onto him - tingling in her arms, her toes and traveling down her spine - Michelle panting as she rests her head on his shoulder, feeling Peter’s heartbeat through his chest, his own arms wrapped around her as if she was the only thing in his world. 

The idea that she loves him comes back to her, her arms still wrapped around him as they both try to catch their breath. It’d be easy, now in the afterglow - to say that it was something borne purely out of the orgasm she’d just had, of him still being inside her, but even Michelle can’t rationalize that that’s the case.

It’s the reason why leaving terrifies her, the idea that they’d finally reached the same wavelength about each other only to be possibly be torn apart. Something between them that wasn’t just lust or a yearning to chase away their past with each other. 

Michelle thinks she might love him. And as she slowly brings her head back, eyes looking into Peter’s as he smiles, she knows that he can see it - understands without her having to say a word what she’s feeling. 

But if she does, if she’ll let herself love him - Michelle won’t say it now, thinking on some level that it’d misconstrued because of what they’d just done. Yet even as she thinks that, she knows that’s not the case, Peter kissing her as she closes her eyes once more before bringing her forehead to his, resting her hands at the back of his neck as slowly caressed her back. 

“That was…” Michelle starts, feeling Peter’s breath against her face. 

“Worth the wait?” Peter asks. Michelle laughs, the movement reminding her of their position - seeing the smirk on his face and the dazed look in his eyes. 

It was almost annoying how good he looked after sex, relaxed and at ease - something she would tease him about more if Michelle’s brain was working right. 

“Maybe. You’re alright, I guess.” She jokes, kissing him. It feels more intimate now, still joined together as she cradled his head in her hands, Peter running his fingers lightly down her back.

It’s gentle, similar to how their first kiss tonight had been. Even with how blissful she felt now, Michelle couldn’t help but think of how relieved she was that he was good - that they were good together - her mind already thinking of the rest of the week, of wondering if Peter was always so gentle and if she could convince him otherwise.

Then she wondered if he thought like her - that their first time together should be different, the way they moved together feeling almost reverential. 

It was a romantic thought, one that for anyone else she would’ve chased away and criticized for being too cheesy. But then it was Peter - and Michelle was beyond trying to rationalize her feelings for him. 

She kisses him again, a quick peck before moving off of him - hearing him laugh as she walks towards the bathroom. 

It’s when she’s sitting on the toilet that she lets the doubt creep in, wondering if she really does love him or if it was just endorphins from sex tricking her brain into feeling things that can’t possibly be true. But as Michelle finishes, flushing the toilet and washing her hands, she can’t get away from the fact that she knew that Peter loved her - something she wants for him to say.

Something she thinks she wants to say back. 

But not tonight, Michelle convinces herself as she walks out of the bathroom - Peter having disposed of the condom and moved the covers, waiting for her. She crawls into bed beside him, feeling a good kind of tired and sore as Peter’s arms move around her, Michelle bringing a hand to his face. 

“You okay?”

She was better than okay, relaxed and content in a way she hadn’t felt in a long time. If any other person had asked her that after sex, she would’ve thought they were fishing for a compliment or wanting her to stroke their ego.

But she knew Peter well enough to know that wasn’t the case, that he just wanted to check in with her - knowing their promise to each other to save any conversation for next week but still wanting to be sure.

Because he  _ loved _ her. 

“I’m good.” She whispered, tracing a finger across his face - his nose, his cheek, Peter’s eyes closing as she lightly brushed some hair from his face. 

She wanted to talk to him - about everything, maybe even about nothing. But Michelle didn’t want to risk having any kind of conversation just then - knowing that he may end up telling her what she knew with such a certainty that it overwhelmed her. 

If Peter loved her, she wanted him to say it in the daylight - wanted him to say it with a clear mind and without anything else influencing him. 

And if Michelle loved him, moving closer to him as she kissed him - she wanted to be sure that it was real, was sure that it was something she truly felt. To know without a doubt that it was true. 

“Are you?” She asks, feeling the smile on his lips before she opens her eyes, looking back at him.

“Better than good.” Michelle smiles, feeling as if she could fall asleep for how content she is. She turns over, letting Peter cuddle her from behind, letting herself think what she already knows to be true, just as she lets herself relax into his embrace.

Michelle knows that Peter loves her.

And just as she starts to drift off to sleep, feeling Peter’s lips brush against her shoulder as he brought her closer to him - Michelle thinks that maybe, she might love Peter back.

* * *

Peter had been through a lot in his life. Orphaned in elementary school, losing his uncle at fourteen. Incredibly high highs and the darkest lows. Yet Peter wonders - as foolish and as naive and romantic as it may be to think, if he’s ever had a week like quite like the one he shared with Michelle. 

For every misunderstanding and problems that they’d had in the last six months, for all the possibilities and issues that they could still face - the last spring break of his college career was spent in almost total bliss. 

Early mornings and late nights that felt like they stretched on for hours, exploring each other as if they had all the time in the world. Long days spent on the beach, laughing and joking over Ned and Betty’s surprising yet not wholly unexpected hook-up, eating their good food and having long talks with the four of them over a bonfire at night. 

It felt like a vacation from school but also a vacation from reality, the kind of week that he’d remember as being almost perfect - years and years in the future. 

And now on their last morning before they had to head back, kissing Michelle gently as he pushed himself inside her, Peter thought it was as if time - the universe, everything - had stopped just for them, even if something nagged in the back of Peter’s mind that told him that it couldn’t last. 

He knows it, knew it even when he first suggested it - the idea of postponing any conversation about the future was only pushing off the inevitable. 

But Peter wondered if maybe this is just what they needed, a reminder that this time together - no matter how long or how short - was worth enjoying, was  _ worth _ everything that they’d been through. 

Peter knows - even if Michelle won’t yet admit it to herself or to him - that she wants to go to Stanford. It’d been her first choice, Peter had known that for months. And as much as the thought of her moving across the country, just when they’d barely had the chance to begin breaks something in him - he would never pressure her to consider starting a long-distance relationship, knowing intimately how easily those could fail.

Even if Peter knew they were both waiting to hear from Columbia, Michelle didn’t want to go there and neither did he. Harvard had been a pipe dream when he had applied and now having been accepted, it seemed foolish to reject them - especially when his acceptance to Columbia wasn’t guaranteed.

It was a great school and if he got in, it would allow him closer to May, but it wasn’t either of their first choices and it was bet that neither of them could really make. 

It’s something he knows Michelle was thinking about, as viscerally as he knows that he loves her - just as much as Peter feels that Michelle might love him back. 

He’d seen it that first night in her eyes, feeling as if they weren’t just having sex but making love - something Peter wouldn’t dare say out loud knowing she’d roll her eyes at it.

But he felt it all the same, seeing that same look in her eyes when they’d take a walk down the beach together, saw it when all four of them went out to watch a movie and he asked her what candy she wanted, saw it as he brushed his teeth in their shared sink - putting her hair up as they got ready for the day. 

Peter loved her. 

And even if she hadn’t said it yet, Peter felt that she loved him too. 

But love - no matter how strong, no matter how true and earned and  _ real _ it could be - couldn’t run away from reality, knowing that they were young and about to embark on paths towards professional careers that would be anything but simple or easy or fun. 

For as much as Peter is glad that he met Michelle, as thankful that he is that despite the bullshit and the problems that they faced that he now got the chance to love her, there was a part of him that wished that they’d met earlier - had maybe gotten over themselves sooner. 

But even as he thinks that, kissing her slowly as he continued to move his hips against hers, Michelle’s hands gripping him tighter as she moved in sync with him, Peter wonders if they’d been ready for each other then, if his wishes for them to have gotten together during that night at Cantab would’ve really been the start of something wonderful or would’ve just caused them to end - truly and definitively - before they’d even been able to begin. 

In a weird cosmic joke, it was almost as if everything had to happen as it did - as if everything that they’d said and done had led them to this moment - to accepting each other and getting to the point where they  _ could _ love each other. 

It’s a realization that does nothing to quell the anxiety in Peter’s chest, the knowledge and statistics and reality of what a long-distance relationship could spell out for them - the possibility of what their future could be weighing him down. 

Michelle’s hips starts to move faster underneath him, Peter opening his eyes and seeing the look on her face - knowing that she was close but that she was also thinking about their future. That this was the last day they could pretend that there wasn’t anything else they had to think about but each other. 

The last day that they could pretend that all that mattered was how much they loved each other. 

Peter brings a hand to her temple, kissing her before moving the same hand to the side to lift himself up, bringing his other hand to her hip, angling himself to hit the place that he knew would send Michelle over the edge. 

As their movements start to get more frantic, Peter wonders if it - the future, the uncertainty, any of it - even mattered at all. 

Maybe he was too young, acting dumb and foolish.

But Peter Parker was also in love. 

And he planned to enjoy every minute of it. 

* * *

“We were wondering when you two would join us.” Betty smirked, Michelle shaking her head as she settled on the wooden chair that Ned had finagled to the beach.

“You’re one to talk,  _ Betty. _ ” Michelle replies, Peter seeing her flush as a mischievous grin flushed across her face. 

“What? A girl’s got needs and Ned here is great at—“

“Ah ah ah ah.” Peter’s voice rings out, putting a hand up. “There’s some things that I don’t need to know. And that,” Peter motions between the two of them as he sits down, “is right at the top of the list.”

“We’re adults, Peter. Suck it up.” Ned offers even as he winks, Michelle laughing at the embarrassing shade of red Peter gets. 

“There’s being an adult and being gross, Ned. I love you man, but there’s some things I just don’t need to know about you.” Peter saying those words so casually cause Michelle to involuntarily bristle, Betty’s chattering grounding her even as her mind raced.

Peter loved Ned, like a friend - she knew it. But hearing about love in the abstract reminded her that Peter loved her even if he hadn’t said it - even after a week together of showing it to each other in every other way but in words - made Michelle wonder if she was fooling herself, again.

She’d seen it this morning in his eyes, that he loved her - that he knew that she loved him. But even after, out of breath and smiling before they got ready to meet Ned and Betty on the beach - Michelle hadn't said it and neither had he, wondering to herself if maybe it would be easier if they didn’t - knowing that would make it so much harder if they broke up. 

She didn’t want to break up - not when it’d taken them this long to get to this point. 

Not when Michelle felt as if they had finally  _ earned  _ the right to be happy. 

Yet Michelle knew that wasn’t always the case, knowing that happiness wasn’t a fixed point - that their college careers were ending but their lives were really only just beginning. 

“I feel like it just brings us closer, you know?” Ned chimes in, bringing Michelle out of her thoughts as he smiles at the two of them. “Not that you two need that or anything.”

“Can you stop? Seriously, it’s going to be awkward when we get back if all we talk about is our respective sex lives. Since when did you guys decide to start dating anyway?”

Michelle’s question makes them both pause, sharing a look of amusement that doesn’t make sense to her. They turn to face her before Betty says, “Oh, we're not together.”

Michelle can see Peter snort, almost choking on his coffee. “Really? Could’ve fooled me the past few mornings.”

“Like I said, a girl’s got  _ needs _ , Peter. Emily and I aren’t exclusive and Ned… I mean, this is like your fifth breakup this year?”

Michelle is the one who chokes now, looking at him in bewilderment as Ned grins.

“Your fifth WHAT now?”

Ned rolls his eyes. “Break-up implies dating. I, like any other senior in need of stress relief, have engaged in the casual hookup, something that none of you seem to have any concept of.”

Peter and Michelle share a look, Michelle shaking her head as she looks back to him - thinking about how much she had misjudged nerdy Ned Leeds before saying, “You are full of surprises, Leeds.”

Ned just shrugs again, winking at her. “Or maybe you’re just unobservant.”

* * *

Breakfast - if you could call coffee and cinnamon rolls that they all had to keep waving the seagulls away from breakfast - felt like another day in their apartment, Michelle still feeling a twinge of bittersweet sadness that the week - and the year - was almost over.

She’s silent as she helps clean up, thinking back to the first day she’d met Ned Leeds and what would’ve happened if she hadn’t signed a lease with him. 

Senior year hadn’t turned out anything like she had planned. Michelle hadn’t heard from Alison in months yet she’s suddenly struck with the urge to text her and thank her. 

If Alison hadn’t gotten together with Brad, she would’ve never lived in this random apartment - and would never have met Peter. 

Not all of the growth she’d done in the past couple of months could rightfully be attributed to him, thinking as she watched him try to unsuccessfully shoo some seagulls away that for as much as she loved Peter - and Michelle was fairly certain that she did - that she would’ve made her peace about everything that had happened with Harry in her own way, even without him. 

It was a freeing thought, to know that Harry didn’t have control over her anymore - that her thoughts that he’d ruined her had been lies, feeling as if she’d finally started to love herself again in a way that she hadn’t in a long time. 

But she still glad for it, even for all the fuck ups that had led them to this point, because while Michelle knew she could conceivably have lived without Peter - she didn’t want to. 

That thought stops her in her tracks, swallowing down a lump in her throat as she considers the choices in front of her. Columbia was up in the air but even the week with Peter hadn’t swayed her any closer to thinking - even if she’d been accepted - that she really wanted to go there. 

She wanted to be with Peter. She wanted to go to Stanford. And Michelle was sick to her stomach at the idea of what that would mean if she wanted to have both.

She sighs, loud enough for Peter to look back at her - an amused look on his face. 

“You ready to be done with these rats with wings too? Seriously, they’re worse than pigeons.” Peter jokes, Michelle just sitting back down on the lawn chairs that Ned and Betty had left behind. They had walked back to the house, arguably to pack but Michelle didn’t really want to think too much about it - seeing Peter’s smile drop as he studies her. 

“Or… all animals are precious, vital and valuable to the ecosystem?” He offers, coming to sit beside her on one of the other chairs. 

“I don’t care about the seagulls, Peter.” 

The words are short but her tone is low, Peter seemingly sensing where her mind was headed. 

“Spring break’s over.”

“Yep.” Michelle answers, eyes meeting his as he leans back into the chair. 

“Well,” he takes a deep breath, exhaling with a low whistle, “What do you want to do?”

“What do  _ you _ want to do, Peter? You’re always asking me about what I think and what I want but it’s not just about my future here. It’s about yours too.” Michelle watches as his gaze shifts downward, pursing his lips as he seems to think. 

“I mean, I kind of want us to never have to go back to real life. Just… live here, you know?” He laughs, looking back at her. “But we can’t do that, can we?”

“No. And it fucking sucks.” Michelle leans back into her own chair, gazing up into the sky. It was a shade of blue that seemed almost seemed unreal, like something straight out of a movie. 

If life were a movie, her and Peter wouldn’t have been through half the shit they’d been through - would’ve met and fallen in love their freshman year, had no issues or drama or any of the bullshit, would probably ride off into the sunset without a care in the world. 

But life wasn’t a movie - it was real, messy and complex in a way that made her head spin and her heart hurt for how unfair things could be. 

She loved Peter. She wanted to be with him. And she wished that it could be enough. 

“Yeah… it does,” Peter says, “But at least it sucks less when I’m with you.” Michelle laughs again, looking back to him - seeing the cheesy smile on his face and a look in his eyes that hits her to the core. 

Peter loved her - despite everything, maybe  _ because _ of everything. 

And as Michelle looks back at him, a small smile on her own face - she knows that she loves him back. 

“Peter—”

“I know.” She sits up, smirking at him as she tilts her head. 

“You  _ know _ ? What exactly do you know?”

Peter’s smile widens, winking at her as he leans forward. “A lot of things. You know, I got into med school after all.”

Michelle rolls her eyes. “Shit, you already got that doctor god complex going for you. I feel bad for your girlfriend.” 

Peter looks as if he’s beaming at her, shrugging as he reaches out for her hand. “I don’t know, she’s kind of a badass. You know she got into law school?”

“Did she now? Sounds like you two are some kind of power couple.” 

“Yeah, we are.” Peter sighs dreamily, Michelle laughing even more as she brings him closer.

“You’re an idiot.”

“I’m  _ your _ idiot.” Peter says it jokingly but Michelle’s struck with the sincerity in it, the realization settling deeply within her. 

They’d acted like idiots for months and months, only coming together after encountering so many problems that for anyone else - Michelle would’ve given up a long time ago. 

But Peter was unlike anyone she had ever met before and even if she was young and had her heart broken before, even if everything in the universe seemed to be set against her, Michelle wants to believe that they could withstand anything else that comes their way - even if her heart quietly whispered that life wasn’t a fairytale. 

Maybe having both - Peter and Stanford - wasn’t impossible. It wouldn’t be easy, but nothing ever was. Their entire relationship had proven that to her, from the minute they met - the odds had been stacked against them.

And yet here they were. 

“Yeah, you are.” Michelle whispers, bringing him close enough to kiss him - closing her eyes as Peter kisses her back. 

It’s soft, gentle in a way that reminds him of each morning they’d spent together - a comfortable kind of domesticity that made her wonder what waking up next to him forever would be like, chasing away the idea as quickly as it came. 

She loves him. She knows it. But Michelle had to be honest with him. 

“I want to go to Stanford.”

Peter nods, not surprised - as if he had known all along and was waiting for her to catch up. But he hadn’t pushed her or had tried to change her mind - as if Peter knew anyway and went ahead with the week, knowing what the move could mean for them.

If Michelle wasn’t already convinced that she loved him, this might have been the moment that pushed her over the edge.

“I know.” He answers, confirming her thoughts. “And I want to go to Harvard.”

He adjusts his position in his chair, turning to face her. “But I also want you, MJ. I want both. Is that so much to ask?”

Michelle sighs, closing her eyes. “I don’t know.”

“But  _ I _ do.” Peter says, tightening the grip in her hand. “I want both and I think you do too. We can figure it out. We have so far.” 

Michelle softly laughs, opening her eyes to see him looking back at her - his face filled with so much love that it makes her almost want to believe that what he’s saying could be true. 

“I love you.” Michelle’s voice is quiet, but sincere - knowing that even if the future seemed unclear that she was certain about this. 

Peter beams, like he knew that too but liked hearing her say it - squeezing her hand gently before saying, “I love you too.” 

It felt significant, the first time they actually said the words. Yet Michelle knew - as well as Peter did - that the words were only confirmation of something they had spent the past week, the past few _months_ \- showing each other.

“What are we going to do?" Michelle asks, "Harvard and Stanford are on opposite sides of the country. This is… it’s not gonna be easy.”

“No,” Peter shakes his head, “but then again, when is it ever for us?”

Michelle doesn't know what to say, seeing the certainty in Peter’s eyes - the complete faith that the love they had for each other was enough - feeling overwhelmed with how much she loved him, even in wondering if it would be enough to make their relationship last. 

She didn’t know what the future would hold, didn’t know what the hell kind of problems that they’d still have face - thinking that of all that she could’ve anticipated for how her final year of college could’ve went, this hadn’t been it.

But with Peter’s hand soft and warm in hers, the words that had taken them months to express hanging between them in the air - Michelle wants to hope, wants to  _ believe _ \- that Peter was right. 

He brings her into another kiss, a hand to her face as she lets go of his hand - wrapping her arms around his waist, bringing him closer. 

No matter what happened next, no matter what the future held - they had each other. 

_ Finally _ , they had each other. 

Maybe it was foolish and naive, an impossible dream to imagine they could survive the distance.

But as his fingers started to get tangled in her hair, the kiss deepening in a way that made Michelle’s head spin - she let herself believe, for the first time in a long time.

Michelle loved Peter. 

Peter loved her back. 

And Michelle hopes - with everything in her that despite everything, that their love could finally be enough. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know what you're thinking.
> 
> But seekrest - what happens next!? Trust me my dudes, I spent weeks debating how to end this and then realized... I'm just not done writing for this universe. 
> 
> There's still so much story to be told about our favorite idiots in love - but especially about _these_ idiots in love.
> 
> There will be one more part - a multi-chap set within this series. Their love has been a JOURNEY but as the name implies: all's well that ends well <3 <3 <3
> 
> I love it when people scream at me in the comments. Or come yell at me on [tumblr!](Https://seek-rest.tumblr.com)


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